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Orthodox name days: what they are and what to do

What an Orthodox name day is, how to find out when someone’s falls, what to say in each tradition, and how to mark it well while you are dating them.

By Orthodate Editorial12 minute read

In much of the Orthodox world the day of your patron saint matters more than your birthday, and in some families it is the only one that is marked at all. If you are dating an Orthodox Christian — particularly one from a Greek, Serbian, Romanian, Bulgarian, Russian or Ukrainian family — the name day is one of the easiest things to get right and one of the more conspicuous things to miss. This guide covers what a name day is, how to find out when theirs falls, what to say in each tradition, and what to do about it in the first year of knowing someone.

At a glance

Key takeaways

  • A name day is the feast of the saint a person is named for, and in much of the Orthodox world it is celebrated in place of, or ahead of, a birthday.
  • Greeting formulas differ by tradition, and using the right one — Chronia polla, Mnogaya leta, La mulți ani, Ad multos annos — is noticed far more than the size of any gift.
  • The Serbian Slava is a household patronal feast rather than an individual name day, it runs in the male line, and being invited to one is a significant step rather than a dinner invitation.

1. What a name day actually is

At baptism an Orthodox Christian is given a saint’s name. That saint becomes their patron: the one whose icon often stands in their home, whose life they are pointed toward, and whose feast in the Church calendar becomes their own day. The name day is that feast.

The logic is different from a birthday, and the difference is the interesting part. A birthday marks the day you were born; a name day marks the day of the person you were named after, which means the celebration is not primarily about you. This is why the customs run the way they do — in most traditions the person whose day it is hosts, feeds people and gives rather than receives, which is the exact inverse of a birthday and catches out almost everyone encountering it for the first time.

Many Orthodox Christians attend the Divine Liturgy on their name day where the parish serves it, bring bread or wine, and commonly receive Holy Communion. The social celebration is the second half of the day, not the whole of it.

2. Finding out when theirs falls

Start by asking, because the shortcut fails more often than people expect. Several distinct saints carry most common Orthodox names, and different families keep different ones. A Nicholas might keep the sixth of December or the ninth of May. A Maria might keep the Dormition, the Nativity of the Theotokos, the Entrance into the Temple or Saint Mary of Egypt. The family knows; a calendar guesses.

The second complication is the calendar itself. Jurisdictions that follow the Julian reckoning keep fixed feasts thirteen days later on the civil calendar than those following the Revised Julian, so the same saint’s day can fall on two different dates for two different families. If the household is Russian, Serbian or Georgian, check which reckoning they keep before putting anything in a diary.

The third is that a baptismal name is not always the everyday name. Converts frequently take a saint’s name at reception that is different from the name on their passport, and plenty of cradle Orthodox go by a shortened form or an anglicised one. “What is your baptismal name?” and “whose feast do you keep?” are two separate questions and both are worth asking.

Where a person’s name has no obvious saint at all — which happens, particularly with converts and with names from outside the traditional Orthodox cultures — a patron is usually chosen at baptism or chrismation, and there is often a story about why that one.

  • Ask which saint, not just which name. Several saints share most names.
  • Check the calendar reckoning if the family is Russian, Serbian or Georgian.
  • Ask for the baptismal name; it is frequently not the everyday one.
  • Note the date and the reckoning in your own calendar the day you learn it.

3. What to say, by tradition

The greeting is the part that matters most and costs nothing. Using the phrase from their own tradition, even badly pronounced, registers as having paid attention. Using the wrong tradition’s phrase is a small and forgivable error; saying nothing is the one that is noticed.

Greek: Chronia polla, “many years”. It is the general Greek festal greeting and is used for name days, feasts and birthdays alike. Also heard: Na zisis, roughly “may you live”.

Slavic: Mnogaya leta, “many years”, in Russian, Ukrainian and Church Slavonic contexts. S dnyom angela, “on your angel’s day”, is the specific Russian name-day greeting and is a nice touch if you can manage it.

Romanian: La mulți ani, “to many years”, used for name days, birthdays and the new year. Serbian: Srećna slava for a household Slava, and the traditional response Sa srećom, “with good fortune”. Latin or English contexts: “Many years” on its own is perfectly good, and is what most English-speaking Orthodox say.

The universal fallback, if you cannot recall which tradition you are in, is simply “Many years!” It is the literal translation of almost all of them and nobody will mind.

  • Greek: Chronia polla.
  • Russian, Ukrainian, Church Slavonic: Mnogaya leta, or S dnyom angela for a name day.
  • Romanian: La mulți ani.
  • Serbian, for a household Slava: Srećna slava, answered with Sa srećom.
  • English, always safe: Many years.

4. The Serbian Slava is a different thing

Serbian practice has a household patronal feast, the Slava, and it is not simply the Serbian word for a name day. The Slava belongs to the family rather than to an individual, and it descends through the male line: a household keeps the saint its forebears kept, sons carry it into their own households, and a woman traditionally takes her husband’s Slava on marriage.

The celebration centres on the Slava kolač, a decorated round loaf, and koljivo, boiled wheat. A priest commonly comes to the home to bless them, or the bread is blessed at the church. The loaf is cut crosswise, turned and shared, and wine is poured over it. The household hosts, at length, and the table is set according to whether the feast falls in a fasting season.

Two things follow for someone dating into a Serbian family. First, being invited to a Slava is not a dinner invitation; it is a family occasion and the invitation carries meaning. Second, if the relationship becomes a marriage, the question of whose Slava the new household keeps is a real one, felt more strongly in some families than others, and much better discussed early than assumed.

The customary answer is that the wife takes her husband’s Slava while continuing to honour her father’s. It is worth asking rather than presuming, because families differ and this is one of the topics where a wrong assumption is remembered.

5. What to actually do, by stage of the relationship

The correct scale of response depends almost entirely on how long you have known each other, and overdoing it early is a more common error than forgetting.

Early on, a message is the whole of it. The right greeting, the saint’s name used correctly, and nothing else. “Chronia polla, Katerina — many years” is complete. Do not send flowers to somebody you have been on three dates with because you discovered it was their name day; it reads as a research project.

A few months in, a small gift is appropriate, and the conventional ones are better than the imaginative ones. An icon of their patron saint is the classic gift and is almost never wrong. Wine, a good sweet, or something for the table also works, particularly because they may be hosting. Flowers are standard in Greek and Romanian practice.

If you are invited to the celebration, remember that the host is the person whose day it is, and behave accordingly: arrive with something, offer to help, and do not expect to be looked after. Mention whether you are fasting if the day falls in a fasting season; the host will already have planned for it and will be glad you said.

And the simple, decisive one: put it in your calendar the moment you learn it, with a reminder two days before. The entire difference between somebody who is good at this and somebody who is not is a calendar entry.

  • First months: a message with the correct greeting. Nothing more.
  • Established: an icon of their patron, wine, sweets, or flowers.
  • Invited to the celebration: bring something, offer to help, do not expect to be hosted.
  • Fasting season: say so in advance rather than at the table.
  • Always: calendar entry, with the reckoning noted, two days of warning.

6. If you are the one without a name day yet

Converts and enquirers often find this whole area slightly alienating, because everybody else appears to have a saint and a date and a family story, and they have none of it. That feeling passes, and the process of acquiring one is one of the more quietly moving parts of becoming Orthodox.

A patron is chosen at baptism or chrismation, usually in conversation with the priest. Where an existing name has an Orthodox saint behind it, that saint is commonly taken. Where it does not, people choose for all sorts of reasons: a life they have read and been struck by, a saint connected to their work or their country, a feast that falls near their birthday, or a name that belonged to someone in their family.

It is worth reading a few lives properly rather than choosing from a list of names. The point of a patron is that you have someone specific to pray to and someone specific to imitate, and that works considerably better when you know who they were.

If you are dating somebody Orthodox while you are still an enquirer, this is a good thing to talk about rather than to be quiet about. Asking them who their patron is, and why, is a genuinely interesting conversation and a far better one than most of what people manage on a fourth date.

7. The mistakes worth avoiding

The most frequent is assuming the name day replaces the birthday entirely, or that it does not. Both happen. Some families mark only the name day, some mark both, some have drifted to birthdays in a new country. Ask which they keep, rather than deciding on their behalf which one is authentic.

The second is getting the calendar wrong and being a fortnight out, which is specifically the failure mode for families on the Julian reckoning. The third is treating a Slava as a name day in conversation with a Serbian family, which is a small error but an obvious one.

The fourth, and the only one that genuinely causes offence, is organising a celebration for somebody without asking. In traditions where the person whose day it is hosts, arranging a surprise party in their honour takes the occasion away from them, and in a fasting season it can put them in an awkward position at their own table.

Learning one person’s calendar properly

This takes about twenty minutes in total, spread over a few weeks, and it covers the whole of what you need for the first year of knowing somebody.

  1. Step 1

    Ask the two questions, in one conversation

    What is your baptismal name, and whose feast do you keep? Ask them together, because the second is the one that actually resolves the date and the first is frequently a surprise. Note the answers exactly, including the saint’s epithet where there is one.

  2. Step 2

    Establish which reckoning the family follows

    Ask whether the family keeps the Nativity on the twenty-fifth of December or the seventh of January. That single question tells you which calendar their fixed feasts fall on and keeps you from being thirteen days out on everything for a year.

  3. Step 3

    Put it in the calendar with two days of warning

    Create a recurring entry with the saint’s name, the greeting for their tradition written out, and a reminder two days before. Add their parents’ name days in the same sitting if you know them, because that is where the real credit lies.

  4. Step 4

    Read the life of their patron saint

    Fifteen minutes, once. It gives you something specific to say on the day beyond the greeting, and it turns a social obligation into an actual interest in the person. It is also the single most reliable way to choose a good gift.

  5. Step 5

    On the day, send the greeting before anything else

    Morning, in their tradition’s words, using the saint’s name. If you are seeing them, ask whether they are going to liturgy and whether they would like company. Offer rather than assume, and follow whatever the household’s custom turns out to be.

Common questions

What is an Orthodox name day?

It is the feast day of the saint a person was named for at baptism. In much of the Orthodox world it is celebrated in place of, or alongside, a birthday, and it usually begins with attending the Divine Liturgy rather than with a party.

How do I find out someone’s name day?

Ask which saint they are named for and which calendar their family keeps. Looking it up is unreliable because several saints share most common names and families differ over which one they observe.

What do you say to someone on their name day?

Chronia polla in Greek, Mnogaya leta or S dnyom angela in Russian, La mulți ani in Romanian, and Srećna slava for a Serbian household feast. In English, “Many years” is correct everywhere.

Is a Serbian Slava the same as a name day?

No. The Slava is a household patronal feast that passes through the male line rather than an individual’s name day, and the family hosts it. Being invited is a meaningful step rather than an ordinary dinner invitation.

What gift is appropriate?

An icon of the person’s patron saint is the traditional choice and is rarely wrong. Wine, sweets or something for the table also work well, particularly as the person may be hosting. Keep it small in the early months of a relationship.

I am a convert with no name day. What happens?

A patron saint is chosen at baptism or chrismation, usually with your priest. People choose for many reasons: a life that struck them, a connection to their work or country, or a feast near their birthday. Reading a few lives properly beats picking from a list of names.

Sources and further reading

Pastoral practice can vary by diocese and jurisdiction. For questions about your circumstances, speak with the priest responsible for your pastoral care.