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Orthodox Christmas: two dates and the Nativity Fast

Why some Orthodox Christians keep Christmas on 7 January, how the forty-day Nativity Fast works, and how couples handle two families with two dates.

By Orthodate Editorial13 minute read

The question arrives in almost every relationship where one person is Orthodox and the other is not, usually in early November and usually phrased as a logistical problem: which day are we doing Christmas? The answer involves a calendar dispute four centuries old, a forty-day fast that starts before most people have thought about December at all, and a feast that is not, in the Orthodox reckoning, the most important one of the year. None of it is complicated once the pieces are laid out, and getting it straight in the first year saves the same argument annually.

At a glance

Key takeaways

  • The January date is the Julian 25 December seen through a civil calendar that has moved thirteen days ahead of it, not an alternative feast or a later celebration.
  • The Nativity Fast runs for forty days and is the part that actually affects a couple: office parties, family dinners and the whole of the run-up to the civil Christmas fall inside it.
  • A household with two dates has an advantage rather than a problem, because the twelve days between them allow both families to be given a real celebration rather than a divided one.

1. Why there are two dates

In 1582 the civil calendar in the West was reformed to correct a drift in the length of the year. Most of the Orthodox world did not adopt the reform, and over the following centuries the gap between the two reckonings widened. It currently stands at thirteen days and will remain there for the rest of this century.

In the 1920s a number of Orthodox churches adopted a revised calendar for the fixed feasts, which aligns them with the civil dates. Those churches keep the Nativity on 25 December as the rest of the country does. The churches that did not adopt it keep 25 December on their own reckoning, which lands on 7 January in civil terms.

Crucially, nothing moved in the church year itself. A Russian parish celebrating on 7 January is not celebrating late; it is celebrating on 25 December, and its own service books say so. The confusion is entirely an artefact of translating between two calendars.

Pascha is the exception to all of this. Every canonical Orthodox church calculates Pascha on the same basis, which is why Orthodox Easter is a single date worldwide even in years when Christmas is not.

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2. Who keeps which date

The churches that keep the Nativity on 25 December in civil terms include the Ecumenical Patriarchate and the Greek Orthodox tradition generally, Antioch, Romania, Bulgaria, Cyprus, Albania, and the Orthodox Church in America. If your partner is Greek, Antiochian, Romanian or in an OCA parish, their Christmas is almost certainly the same day as everyone else’s.

The churches that keep it on 7 January in civil terms include the Russian Orthodox Church and the Russian Orthodox Church Outside Russia, the Serbian Orthodox Church, the Georgian Orthodox Church, the Patriarchate of Jerusalem and the monasteries of Mount Athos. Old Calendarist groups in Greece and elsewhere also keep the older reckoning.

Ukraine is a live and recent exception. The Orthodox Church of Ukraine adopted the revised calendar in 2023, so a great many Ukrainian families are now keeping 25 December where their parents kept 7 January. If your partner is Ukrainian, this is worth asking about specifically rather than assuming either way, because the change is recent and families have handled it differently.

The Armenian Apostolic Church is a separate case again and belongs to the Oriental Orthodox family rather than the Eastern Orthodox one. It keeps the Nativity together with Theophany on 6 January, and the Armenian Patriarchate of Jerusalem keeps that combined feast on the Julian reckoning, which puts it in the middle of January in civil terms.

  • 25 December: Greek, Antiochian, Romanian, Bulgarian, Cypriot, Albanian, OCA.
  • 7 January: Russian, ROCOR, Serbian, Georgian, Jerusalem, Mount Athos.
  • Ukrainian parishes: ask, because the calendar changed recently.
  • Armenian: the Nativity and Theophany kept together on 6 January.

3. The forty days before it

The Nativity Fast is the part that actually changes how December feels, and it is routinely missed by people who assume Orthodox Christmas is simply a dinner on a different day. It runs for forty days: from 15 November to 24 December on the revised reckoning, and from the equivalent Julian dates, which fall in late November through early January in civil terms, for the churches on the older calendar.

The fast excludes meat, dairy and eggs. Fish, wine and oil are permitted on some days and not others, and the detail differs between traditions and becomes stricter in the final week. It is a fast of preparation rather than of mourning, and it is generally kept with less intensity than Great Lent, but it is a real fast and lasts a long time.

The collision with secular December is obvious once you see it. Office parties, family dinners, the neighbours’ open house and the entire cultural apparatus of the season sit inside the fasting period. An Orthodox Christian keeping the fast is doing so at exactly the time of year when everyone around them is doing the opposite, which takes a quiet and sustained effort that is rarely visible.

For couples on different calendars there is a further wrinkle. A household where one person keeps the revised calendar and the other the Julian one will have a fortnight in which one of them has finished the fast and is feasting while the other is still in it. That is a small thing that becomes a large thing at a shared table, and it is best planned rather than discovered.

4. What actually happens on the eve

In most traditions the eve is the strictest day of the fast and also the one carrying the most ceremony. The common thread across cultures is a meatless supper eaten after the first star appears, followed by the services of the feast itself.

In Ukrainian and much of Slavic practice the meal is the Holy Supper, twelve lenten dishes for the twelve apostles, beginning with kutia, a wheat and honey dish. Hay under the tablecloth and a place laid for the absent or the dead are common. In Russian practice a similar dish, sochivo, gives the eve its name.

Serbian practice centres on the badnjak, an oak branch brought into the home and burned, and on the round loaf called česnica on the day itself, with a coin baked inside it. Greek practice has Christopsomo, a decorated bread, and children going door to door singing the kalanda. Romanian practice has colinde, carols with a repertoire that runs for hours and is taken seriously.

None of this is decorative. For a partner meeting the family at Christmas, these are the evenings where the household is most itself, and arriving having asked one question about what the family does is worth more than any gift.

  • A meatless supper on the eve, traditionally after the first star.
  • Kutia and the twelve dishes in Ukrainian and Slavic homes.
  • The badnjak and česnica in Serbian practice.
  • Christopsomo and the kalanda in Greek practice.
  • Colinde, sung at length, in Romanian practice.

5. Christmas is not the largest feast of the year

This is the point that most surprises people from Western backgrounds, and it reframes everything else. In the Orthodox calendar Pascha is the feast of feasts, by a distance that is not close. The Nativity is a great feast and a beloved one, but the emotional and liturgical centre of the year is in the spring.

The practical consequences are visible. Orthodox families often spend far more on Pascha than on Christmas, travel further for it, and treat the week before it as the one that clears the diary. A partner who assumes that Christmas is the big one and Easter is the small one has the year upside down.

There is also a gift culture difference. In much of the Orthodox world the main gift-giving day historically attached to Saint Nicholas in December or to the New Year rather than to the Nativity itself, and in many families the name day still matters more than either. Gift expectations are therefore much more variable than the North American pattern suggests, and asking is better than guessing.

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6. The twelve days, and Theophany

The feast does not end on the day. The period from the Nativity to Theophany is a festal season in its own right, and in most traditions it is fast-free, which is why the week between the civil Christmas and the New Year is one of the easiest times of the year to host Orthodox guests.

Theophany, the baptism of Christ in the Jordan, falls twelve days after the Nativity: 6 January on the revised reckoning and 19 January in civil terms on the Julian one. It is a major feast, involves the great blessing of water, and in many parishes the priest then visits parishioners’ homes to bless them through January. It is also the feast where you will see people swimming in very cold water for a cross.

For a couple, Theophany is the natural point at which to ask about having the home blessed. It is an ordinary thing to request, it costs nothing, and for a household that has just been formed it is one of the small customs that establishes a shared practice rather than two individual ones.

7. Running a household with two dates

Treat the twelve days as an asset rather than a scheduling conflict. A couple with a 25 December family and a 7 January family can give both a full celebration without either being the consolation prize, which is a genuinely better position than the one most couples are in.

Decide the pattern in November, not in the third week of December. Which house on which date, who travels, what is cooked, and what happens in the years when work or children make both impossible. Write it down the first year and it becomes the default rather than an annual negotiation.

Be specific about fasting at shared meals. If one of you is still fasting when the other family is feasting, tell the host in advance and offer to bring something. Hosts are almost never offended by a guest who has told them; they are frequently embarrassed by a guest who quietly eats nothing.

Name the asymmetry honestly if one of you is not religious. A partner who does not fast is not obliged to pretend, and a partner who does should not be expected to skip the eve service for a dinner reservation. The households that manage this well do so by treating both as fixed points and planning around them rather than by negotiating each year over which matters more.

  • Agree the December plan in November, in writing.
  • Use the twelve days rather than competing over one date.
  • Tell hosts about fasting in advance and bring something.
  • Treat both the service and the family dinner as fixed, not as rivals.

8. If this is your first December together

Ask three questions in early November and you will be better prepared than most people who have been doing this for years. Which date does the family keep; what happens on the eve; and is the fast kept strictly, moderately or not at all in this household.

Offer to come to the eve service. It is long, it is often late, and it is the single most revealing evening of the Orthodox year for someone standing on the outside of it. Going once tells you more about what your partner grew up inside than a year of conversation.

Do not give a gift that breaks the fast if the fast is being kept, which rules out most food hampers, chocolates and cheese. Wine is generally safe. Something for the table, for the icons, or for the house is safer still.

And keep the greeting simple. “Christ is born!” with the response “Glorify Him!” is the traditional exchange across most traditions, and using it correctly on the day is remembered far longer than whatever was wrapped.

Plan December before November ends

Thirty minutes in early November removes almost every difficulty that otherwise turns up in the third week of December, when nobody has the time or the patience to solve it.

  1. Step 1

    Establish both families’ dates and write them down

    The Nativity date for each family, the eve, Theophany, and any name days in the same period. Put every one of them in a shared calendar with a reminder a week ahead so neither of you is reacting at the last moment.

  2. Step 2

    Ask how strictly the fast is kept in each household

    The answers range from complete abstention to a vague intention, and both are normal. You need the actual answer to plan meals, gifts and the office-party question, and the question is much easier asked in November than at a table in December.

  3. Step 3

    Decide which house on which date, once

    Alternating years, or one family on each date, or hosting both. Any settled answer is better than an unsettled one. Tell both families the decision at the same time rather than letting one hear it from the other.

  4. Step 4

    Choose fast-safe gifts and a fast-safe dish

    One reliable gift and one dish you can bring to any table during the fast is a small investment that pays out every year. Wine, something for the icons, or a good lenten dish will cover almost every situation you will face.

  5. Step 5

    Go to one service you would not otherwise attend

    The eve service, or Theophany with the blessing of water. Attending once, as a couple, is what turns the calendar from an administrative problem into something you share, and it is the step couples say afterwards that they were glad of.

Common questions

Why is Orthodox Christmas on 7 January?

It is not a different date in church terms. Churches that did not adopt the revised calendar keep the Nativity on 25 December by the Julian reckoning, which currently corresponds to 7 January on the civil calendar. The thirteen-day gap will hold for the rest of this century.

Do all Orthodox Christians celebrate on 7 January?

No. Greek, Antiochian, Romanian, Bulgarian and OCA parishes generally keep 25 December in civil terms. Russian, Serbian, Georgian and Jerusalem practice keeps the January date. Ukrainian parishes largely moved to the December date in 2023, so ask rather than assume.

What is the Nativity Fast?

A forty-day fast of preparation before the feast, excluding meat, dairy and eggs, with fish, wine and oil permitted on some days depending on the tradition. On the revised calendar it runs from 15 November to 24 December; on the Julian reckoning it falls thirteen days later in civil terms.

Can I take my Orthodox partner to a Christmas party in December?

Yes, but the food is likely to be a problem if they are fasting, and the date may fall in the fast even for a partner whose Christmas is on 25 December. Ask first, offer to eat beforehand, and do not make an issue of it in front of other people.

What do Orthodox Christians say instead of Merry Christmas?

The traditional exchange is “Christ is born!”, answered with “Glorify Him!”. The Greek Kala Christougenna, Romanian Crăciun fericit and Slavic S Rozhdestvom are all in ordinary use as well, and plain Merry Christmas offends nobody.

Is Christmas the biggest Orthodox holiday?

No. Pascha is the feast of feasts and is by far the larger event in practice: more travel, more preparation, more of the year built around it. Christmas is a great feast, but a partner planning the year should expect the spring to be the busy season.

What is Theophany and why does it matter?

Theophany commemorates the baptism of Christ and falls twelve days after the Nativity. It involves the great blessing of water and, in many parishes, house blessings through January. For a new household it is the customary moment to ask the priest to bless the home.

When is Armenian Christmas?

The Armenian Apostolic Church keeps the Nativity together with Theophany on 6 January. The Armenian Patriarchate of Jerusalem keeps the same combined feast on the Julian reckoning, which places it in the middle of January by the civil calendar.

Sources and further reading

Pastoral practice can vary by diocese and jurisdiction. For questions about your circumstances, speak with the priest responsible for your pastoral care.